Miss.

I feel discouraged.

Why they didn't bother to tell me?

-----








BYE BYE Abigail~~

Sobs sobs really sad that you are going to leave!!
All the way to JB T.T..

Sad sad..
We've been so close ever since you started joining our CG..
Really going to miss you man, ish..

Well, do hope that you will visit us as much as you can..
Hope that you will love the lippie that I bought today, lols..
And that SaSa girl actually recognize me =.= Embarrassing.
She even knew what I was looking for =.=
zzzz...

Thank God we got to meet today =) It was really a last minute choice, since I knew that she is going south just this monday..
And I think I gained some weight after heading to Christine's restaurant for lunch (Should have shared instead)...
We lingered there for some time until the waitress have to shoo us away. Lols..




Love the latest elianto collection =) Really nice (But the price is double lol)


Had secret recipe that bloated our stomach even more!!
Thanks for the treat by the way, I didn't know it was so nice!



Camwhore A LOT. Almost up to 30 shots in my phone lols, but we really had a great time =)
Despite of the awkwardness, both of us camwhored anyway. Who cares?
And I brought my super big mirror (The blue one) and put it on the table for a more precise shot. =.=

And I want the pics in your camera abby, pwease pwease upload it !!




You know us right? Whoever in church knows that I am a BIG fan of make up.
Make up make up make up!!
Now you know what make us so close, lol, vain? Think again =)
She has a lot of cool stuff, that I always dream of buying! Sobs...
Majorlica majorca .. er... I CANNOT RESIST IT!!!

Found out that she spent a lot on clothes, I am more on the cosmetic side, muaha!


Really really really wanted the gel liner that was released from maybelline yesterday =(
And It was a clean sweep when I went to watson's. Only 2 more left.
Rm 39. Actually the pricing is okay, but it is just, a bit expensive for me because I don't have a lot of pocket money. And I still owe Yeng money (Still haven't give yet)
And I just realized that K.A.T.E is having sales too!! Yeah, gotta spulrge on it more, Nene.

Just don't feel like bragging too much today. Lol.

Had lots of fun, How I wish that the both of us could stay a little longer. Time really, really files.

Still remember the time we camwhored during yf camp last year.

And now --- cha ching! It is going to be one of the last..

=(..


----

Just got to know my position in class today.

I don't know, i Think I did okay, but not good though.

Sigh... Well have to do add maths now~ Chao~

---
God bless you dear, will uphold you in my prayer always =)







Muaha.

Ecstatic~!

Well, today was unbelievable!


After having a wonderful night last night with my dad..






I













Actually













PASSED MY ADD MATHS !!

PASS, PASS ,PASS!


For those geniuses out there I am sure that you would be thinking , How hard is it for add maths? That tough?


But Unfortunately it wasn't for me. Lols, guess that maths is not in my genes. Lols.

Unlike Mah siew Ho, that does add maths every single day, and complete an exercise book within 3 days=.=

No wonder why he says almost every Q's he thinks that he did it somewhere.


DUH?


He even does the success reference book..

so many times..

until

he

feels

bored.


I sit beside him can die la.


Hmm, not happy after getting 76 for paper one. Crazy.






But I think this is so surreal to me, because I overcame the the feeling of failure.

All this while I didn't know how it feels like to fail, and to think that hope isn't there for the first time..

When ALL efforts are wasted, you would be thinking, is this what I deserve to get??



I think I know how it feels when people did badly in their SPM.

It sucks.

And much devastating then where I stand now, when I get the chance to start all over.


Sigh, when Abigail told me that she almost turn her back against God when she didn't get what she expect for SPM, I was kinda skeptical about it.

I didn't know how it feels, and I thought it will never happen to me...



But it did, and I gone through it.


I cried, I almost gave up...


But I am back again, because I knew it is part of God's purpose in my life to be even stronger!


I even get very discouraged with my close friends lately..

That I am the only passionate person, no one seems to be into what is happening lately.


Thank you beatrice =) I really owe you a lot for this !!



By the way, I am feeling ecstatic now! I just passed, with mere hope of even touching 30. Wow!

Thank you God, so much, words cannot express how I feel =)



When I wrote " I passed ^^" On the blackboard..

The whole class rejoiced!


Chee Soon jumped all around, banging tables and almost hit the blackboard when he passed xd

So funny! Those who got their papers annouced "passed" instead of "A's"



Like as if got 10A'1 for SPM.

whoa.

Should have recorded it instead XD


This thing made me so much stronger, and I am recharging my battery for the days yet to come! Bring it!


Muahaha.


And I got quite good for sejarah hehehe. Sometimes I don't even think I deserved it. Seriously, cos IT was really last minute.


















And, to beloved abigail, my dear sister..

Hopefully you will be reading this post..




Even though you will bid farewell to us, just this sunday, before we really had the chance to have a gathering in church.

Just really want to say, whatever it is, stay headstrong, and persevere all the way!!


Your uni results was unexpected, even though as far as JB..

But I will always remember you! And you will always be a part of our CG =)

Hearts &&

May you be the light to others, and spread God's ever amazing love!


Miss you loads sis ~~


toodles ^^

zzz

Only 3 months left...

And I can't believe I am getting this!



Ish.. ish..


June is gone, with the holidays? Hmph, needless to say..



How am I going to finish everything? Gotta sacrifice all of my naps, and swap it with studying instead.





Add maths chapter 5 I am so blurr laa! And probability .. OMG I HAVE TO TEACH IT IN FRONT OF THE CLASS!


.....


I think that is even worst then trigonometry. Sobs.










Seminar this week, hopefully I would be able to stay awake that day =(



Toodles. =((


A very unhappy 101th post.

The best day of my life =)

Hmm.. so many many things happened during this long stretch of school holidays,
Frankly speaking, this long stretch of school holidays were really meaningful to me, apart of bizarre shopping sprees, endless chatting nights, and the sleep that you can have all day long ...


And also --- I experienced one of the most traumatic moments of my life, with faliure crushing down on me, with hurt and disappointment, that has altogether made my holidays even more precious then just mere, old, boring holidays...

And to Let it all go --facing school life once again, with the ticking of the clock --- inevitably we have to face school, and move on every single time of our lives regardless of how well it goes ... and to live it to its fullest =)


Before starting about my life, just really, and seriously, I want to thank GOD for making it all so surreal to me, with pain, hurt, disappointment that almost brought me down to level zero.

With this verse ,
Isaiah 55:8 -- For my thoughts are not your thoughts, for my ways are not your ways.

Consider it true joy when you are forced to face the worst days of your life,
because in God's eye, He knew that you are ready to move on to the next level, growing stronger from glory to glory.

=)

-----

Wow, so many events happened to me, I really don't know where to start!
Help, help! I rant continuously when I get excited


Just went to Beatrice's house for our f5 cg gathering + sleepover yesterday ^^

It was so fun, yeah! Till a point I really want to turn back time and experience it all over again.




Zanne, Cass, Jess and Ginny were the few ones that reached there early, and when I was there almost all the cupcakes were prepared for baking..


All sorts of weird patterns were created by weird artists me..

It was fun "chaking" and mixing the chocolate and orange fillings into weird designs, I pratically screwed the one with a "cross" sign on it. zzzz..

Not Long after that, Andrew and rest of the boys arrived..

As usual, Andrew would be the one offering help, darell and william were talking proceeded with Wen Qi's Lame joke.

After stirring the spagetti, where Ginny was the one doing most of it, the muffins were finally done!



Yum yum, nice right? Right? MOUTH WATERING RIGHT? RIGHT??

Haha, bear with my hyper mood for a while yeah ^^


Thanks to Beat's mum for preparing such good food, and all of them was sapu-ed by us. Lols,
Me and Zanne were really good kids and we washed all of the dirty plates and bla.






And Zanne was really slow at washing stuff.


And I my hand had rinkles because of her. Grr.













And Andrew said that the guys had no guts to wash plates! LOL




But I think they were quite good at it.



Just a little skeptical about disposing the bones =.=



Maybe cus we were a little "sampa" that we didn't knew that bones could be literally thrown in the basin. Cos her basin got a kinda special idunnowhat thing that could liquify the bones o.O.
It is like some sort of machine that could cut? the small bones into pieces. What am I talking? Bla whatever ..







Abby and her Darling was also there not long after almost everything were finished, including the very very tasty spagetti and chicken wings, at least they could still savour the delicious muffins and potongs (The long long ice cream that is very popular in Malaysia, in case you don't know what it is.)

Er, actually, I don't really know how to desribe potong. Ah, forget it.


Too bad Cherie have to attend some sort of wedding ceremony on that day. Sobs, pity,pity ..






Finally, we watched a inspirational movie, called facing the giants.

It was really nice, and encouraging, cos the situation faced by the people in it actually reflects to the problem I am facing now.













I can't believe I actually cried when that big guy crawled at the end zone instead of 50 yards.

I think the actor can be a motivational speaker or something. It was really good.



And the funniest part was the old man that raised his hands up each time his son was on the game. LOL. We even pose a group picture about that.




Unfortunately the photos are with Abby now. Have to bug her for the photos!



Then, we had a discussion time when all of us rant about our testimonies and great things that God had done for us.

Which randomly lead into out-of-topic discussions instead =.=


But when I shared about my emo experience, and how God delivered me through it, I was like, very sad in a sense. I couldn't take the flashbacks any longer, and I kinda like cried after that.

But after all of that, I felt so much better. I finally released that pain that haunted me for such a long time....

Thanks for hearing me out guys =)


And it was really touching about what Andrew had said about experiences. It is not a bad thing that we face problems, but, we actually grow stronger and more mature about encountering problems in the future.

And you will never know that someone will face the same problem you had faced in the past, with that, you can actually help them..



And he also said that God uses people around you, to encourage and help you in times of need.

Thank you zanne and beat for telling me to read the exact verse when I was lazy to read the bible. =.=



Hahaha, then after that Chermaine rants a lot about her hives thingy.

In Jakarta, about not eating veggies =.=

I think it was rather funny because she just rant the whole entire time and Andrew didn't have the oppucunity to say anything. Hahahahaha


I didn't believe when Zanne mentioned that she was really talkative.

I think I believe now, cos she was really talkative that night XD


Haha, and her testimony is that, after being really sick for 5 days, with hives and everything,
she thanked God that she got sick because she eats veggies now.

And rest more.

LOL, but it was really nice hearing her appreciating all those hard times with hives. I don't think I could even stand it for a day because it is really itchy!!


With that, I think, you don't need a dramatic experience to show that God is there for you. In all situations, he is always there =)


And we talked about a lot of interesting stuff. I don't think I can say everything here because I think my blog would actually burst. There were just too many things XD

And you don't want to see me all hyped up again because I would turn on my talkative mode that could be even worst then Chermaine XD




But I think I changed a lot after that long discussion. We talked and exchanged views about a lot of things that I didn't realize how important it is. To keep yourself away from earthly desires, and not to be too materialistic (Which I have this syndrome)


And kudos to Beat about her testimony, about a pastor that went through the experience of hell. It was really creepy, and I really cannot imagine if i had to see how the lost souls were threatened when they were in hell...ish...


We talked for three long hours and I don't think it would end if it wasn't because about the time.

It was 12am already. zzz.

No wonder we always don't have enough time during CG, and always the noisiest and the latest to go back.

=.=

---

Not long after that the fun time begins ^^

Only me, ginny and zanne stayed back for sleepover at Beat's house.

I think it was rather crazy because we all were not sleepy at all and continue to have pillow talk all the way to 3am. I wonder how I would not run out of saliva =.=



The worst part is that we had make up at 1am. Lols, crazy right??

And Zanne finally put some on because she was becoming an outcast.. Lol.

I taught Beat some tricks, and she was cute when she wanted to learn how to makeup. And pretty serious about learning some tricks from me. LOL..


The tools =)





Camwhoring with zanne..


Fa qiao-ing with Beat..



Me and Darling..




I lurve this pic !! The sleepoverers =)


Where is Ginny? Kesian her la, did you notice that every pic her face was cut into half?


And I think the funnier part is that we remove stains on our eyes and 2.30am. 3.ooam Sleep.
zzz




Unfortunately, most of us woke up late, and we didn't manage to make up for church service. Instead we did it last night. zzzz.


And I almost dose off during service. Haha.

Kesian Gin and zanne cos they only manage to sleep for an hour. Lol.



And thanks to Abby for that cute mirror from Etude House!!




Wee..



I know this blog is super long..


But bare me for a little while because it is my

















100th post!!!





Want some more??

Rest, mayhem.

Woohoo..

I am enjoying myself doing NOTHING!!

Besides there were days that were.. very troublesome.

Tuition? What else?

zzzz.

Sigh, how I wish everyday could be like this.

Sleep, eat, do nothing, walk here walk there, play pc like mad.





And I am going to meet my cg peeps tomorrow! Another invasion =)


Guess the f1 really love us, nia ha, perasan again !!








Curse SPM, percubaan, and my freaky mid year exam. Ugh.

I feel like to burn all the papers. Lols.

Or even give the teachers a hand, so they don't need to waste their energy marking my papers
=.=..





FACEBOOK.







See that word up there?

I cannot believe that I kinda love it now.


Since I always find applications boring, eg, twitter, myspace, etc etc...



And I buried friendster long ago.


Ahahahaha.










Well, needless for me to elaborate my points for this (Cos I believe most of you have it)..


Click on RESTAURANT CITY , at your application link at the bottom!!


For those who don't know what facebook is, register one!!










So if more people play the game I will get more ingredients







Seriously, this game is a total hook up! I bet playfish is earning tonnes out of this=)

Every single time when I want to enter that game, surely, once or twice the server will be completely FULL.

Even though it is freaking annoying, but trust me, it is the best game ever!!


Even bookworms ronnie are also attracted to that game!! and he beat me





So what are you waiting for??


Stop staring at my blog and click






Do it now!!

P/S: I smell something fishy, wayne gimme back my stove!!!!

Thank who?

Crap..

Thanks to ROY AND DADDY yesterday..

And my brother ....













First time ever in my life, I walked like hell man!!

Apart from walking back home from school before, this time is from the LRT station all the way to jalan samping Maybank for Add maths...

Grr... and I was wearing a dress. OMG..

I don't know how in the world i manage to walk so freaking far..



Just because my dad came back late, and slept so soundly in the morning,

My bro that was cussing when I begged him to fetch me there (Which was only to the bus stop),

And to Mr.Roy and his friends who didn't manage to tell me about the change of timetable during the holidays...

!@#$$$%%%

I left early the previous week, so I wasn't informed..

Lucky yeng told me man, the night before, if not I would have present myself like a complete nuisance at 5pm...

Standing there

...

...


Knowing that I was trigophobic, he just had to teach it yesterday didn't he???

Grr...


I told him that I didn't want to go, cos by the time I reach there will be very late,

And he even sms me continuosly on the phone, as though chatting, buying my time to sleep even more...


And he called up requesting me to go.

Ugh, and it was 8.30 already, starts at 9. Ish!!

But he was really kind and desperate, he said he could even fetch me from my house to his tuition centre!! Boy, I never heard of a tuition teacher that would be as .... hospitable? Maybe as kind as him.. Lols.. (Can't believe I am actually saying this)


OMG, I gave in anyway, give him credit for being so.... er... nice. Haha



When I gushed towards the car, my bro was !@#$%^&* at me, and when we were in the car, I actually forgot to bring money for the bus fare. Gulps**


I was so scared, and with his mood, I rather not ask.

But what is the use if he send me there and I have no money to take a bus? It is like I am going there to breathe fresh air or something. zzz.


When he took his purse out, I noticed that his purse...



..




..





..





..




..




was made out of duct tape.


..

Seriously, duct tape =.=



Thank God the bus arrived just in time, but the bus drove so freaking slow.

Ish, like a car broke down or something, ugh, it was really on my nerves!!


Prayed hard that it would accelerate, but it was just as slow as a snail. =.=



Reached the place super late, and I didn't notice that there was a cross over bridge.


I almost committed suicide for crossing that road. Dang, there were so many cars!!



Lucky thing I was freaked out and I called Roy, if he did not tell me I would be a goner my now =.=...


The walking part was so tiring, and it was crazy..




Wearing a dress, a super heavy necklace (I don't know I wore those stuff for what, more like torturing myself), and a pair of slippers..

My calves were filled with lactic acid and I can feel the cramps giving in any minute..

It was crazy!


WOW. I never walked sooo far for tuition, and never dared before..

I did it within 20 mins (usually appox around 45), and sprinted to the restroom first before entering the class.



Phew, what an experience.


And on that day I made history (for Roy, that is) for going though all the stupid stuff just for TUITION.

So lame. Ugh.

But at least I know I am 0.0000000001 % of overcoming my trigophobic syndrome.

Yesh, yesh.


Gotta go there more often =.=














And thanks to him again for fetching me to jusco, and borrowing me a buck to take a bus home!!







And again, thanks to whom?



You knew it, don't you??

Holidays...

It has been an emo week for me.

ZZZZZ.

Just, I don't feel like mentioning any of it..

Sigh.

------




Thanks to daddy for buying me this nice nail colour... tempting.. tempting..

I have been really exercising self control for not putting this on..

School holidays are rolling on, and i really don't have the mood to be so "guai" in a sense..




















So I just apply the nail thingy on 4 fingers. Two left two right, just to give the teacher some face :p.


And on that day when I present my oral, teacher didn't even realize.


Grr, should have apply it on all ten fingers instead. =.=



And i was forced to leave that place on 9.30am thanks to mr.Donald for offering bio extra classes on that day. I really wanted to sleep though.

zzzz..








I want to eat this cake again!!

Yummy yummy... Happy birthday to Li Yen =) And thanks to wan ching, li huan, and idunnowhasshisname for baking this cake. OMG, I didn't believe it was homemade when I saw this.. it looks so neatly baked.




Tadah ~~ Please bake more in the future =)




----


Went to TS right after tuition, and I got there not even more then 15 minutes. Muahaha...

I saw lots of shutter shades there, and I actually thought of buying one...



I didn't bring much money, so I was forced to starve for the whole entire time..

So hungry.. sobs... I almost wanted to ask that little boy to give me his fishballs O.O


T.T.. Even with my emo mood, I manage to grab some nice clothes.. and I actually used up all my savings O.O

I never felt so desperate before, haha, but I just don't feel like asking from my parents anymore...

I bet I could not return them the full amount of money that I have owe them, even though after studying, working, and bla...



So I gotta get scholarship !!




And I met Ashwin in Leisure mall =)


He hasn't changed much though, still look quite the same..

AND I BEGGED HIM TO BELANJA ME MCD!! Cos I was just so freaking hungry and I ain't had any money..




And he ended up buying me a piece of bread instead. zzzz..

After that I temaned him to get his laptop cover, he was so picky and choosy, most of the time complaining about how dirty his laptop was. And he didn't want to put the cover himself, he requested the salesman to do it for him.

What the..? The cover for the keyboard was too big, and he wanted the salesman to cut it for him.. LOL

And that I really pity that guy, ash really gave him a tough time asking all sorts of weird questions..

What should I do if the cover falls off?
What should I do if I lose the cover?
What should I do if the cover covers my speaker?
What should I do if the cover spoils?
What should .. #$%^& crap...


Just to shift the cover to the other side needed two salesman to shift it for him. Ish ish ish..


The worst thing was that he demanded for a warranty.


Omg, that cover is only rm10, hello?


...

Hahaha, but he was so funny! I really miss those times when we used to crap in school..





And he was kind enough to offer me a ride back home, since my bro and dad couldn't fetch me at the bus stop =)

And he forgot where he parked his car, and he never took the car ticket for autopay =.= He say he left it in the car ... lols..


After waiting for him awkardly in car, he finally decided to flaunt his driving skills.

And I was freaking scared because that guy never put the safely belt when he drives..



But surprisingly it was okay, he never sped like how I imagined it would be..

And amazingly enough, he knew where i live ...

Stalker!!


Glad that you enjoyed college life, and all the best to your diving lesson! Hopefully the trainer doesn't get splashed with water every where with your professional diving skills.



And yeah..


Finally get to rest after 3 hectic days of tuition, school, tuition , school..


zzz..

----

Guess what? I cooked for the whole family today=)

Since mama is in china, so I had to cook something for them..


Muahaha, tasty tasty rite?

Yum yum, it is super easy to fry, jus have to cut the sausages and then proceed to the egg..

And mua daddy is crazy over eggs and he wanted me to fry 6 eggs. Oh well..

And he is a veyr good soup cook!! Surprisingly he cooks quite well, and he is anticipating every meal to cook for us=)




Love you mum, pwease come back soon..


I can't be eating eggs everyday right...

I am learning to cook spagetti this sunday, muahahha!!



P/S: Pwease cher, get me my falsies quick!! Pwease, pwease...

Sad.

Do you ever felt this way before?

From the start itself, how much hard work and effort you had put into succeeding in something..

And you put so much of effort...


Going here and there, buying this and that...

Because you don't want to just fail in whatever you were doing...

And the time especially..



Just ....



....






I feel very hopeless now. And each moment I thought of it just makes me want to cry.


How can I not give up?