Lack.

Somewhat, some things are waning:

1) The fighting spirit.
I feel that some part of me begin to feel very ... dead. Like nothing really bothers me anymore. Even with bad results, I feel that I don't really care how much it would affect me. Bad means bad, and reality is going to resurface no matter how much I deny it.

2)Pray
I pray, yes I do. But I don't know why I just don't have the 'omph' to pray and really cry out to the Lord. There is nothing that really drive me to thrive for that close relationship with God. I am often 'forcing' myself, because it starts from there. But then, after some time it just stops. And I have to start all over again ...

Basically, I am starting to feel neutral to a lot of things that are happening around me. Is that good? Where bad things don't really matter anymore, because it happen all the time?

I used to brood a lot about SAM. But now I barely care about how stress it is, how tiring it is, how difficult it is. It just is? Hah.

Maybe my genes are starting to develop some kind of adaptation to all these things?

Mediocre. Is that all to it?

Hmm, I don't know. But not having any drive does make life a little boring.



Guess I am a bit to tired to face it altogether.

Oops, physics exam tomorrow, chemistry tutorial and moral presentation.


Ugh... another sleepless night. :(